Dating with Vitiligo – don’t shy away from exploring
If you are living with Vitiligo and are tired of holding back from exploring dating and relationship adventures, it’s alright because majority of the people among the vitiligo community feel the same. But, should this non-contagious and non-harmful, aka ‘innocent’ skin condition should dry down your chances of dating success?
Definitely not!
But, vitiligo does narrow down the dating opportunities for a lot of people and something must be done about it.
The years of negative thinking pattern will take some serious effort at your end to get rid of the poor body-image and start feeling confident, attractive and good enough to jump into the dating pond and start looking for your someone special.
But, it’s worth the effort because discovering a partner who would accept, support and love you as you are is something truly incredible.
Let’s get started and reveal some time-tested dating tips that work.
Learn to love yourself first
Before you want others to feel attracted to you, you have to feel attractive, confident and lovable yourself. It’s just a matter of common sense but most of the people miss out on it.
It is not the responsibility of others to make you feel worthy or good about yourself. If they do, that’s a big bonus but the primary responsibility lies with you only because it’s your life and you have got the key to happiness here.
When you look for a partner to date, you choose someone who possesses confidence and self-love, right?
The same goes with others.
If you love and respect yourself, without getting egoistic or rude, you become incredibly desirable and attractive.
On the contrary, if you are hesitant and don’t feel good about yourself, you need to work on yourself before you stand a chance for success in the dating world.
You are more than the vitiligo spots on your body
Please do not associate your self-worth with vitiligo. It is just a small part of your personality.
God has made everyone of us unique and gifted, and vitiligo is just one simple aspect of your personality that cannot and should not define you.
In today’s time, the virtual world created by the online social media can easily hurt our own body image and self-esteem as we are constantly exposed to ideal body type, in the form of fitness instructors, models and celebrities. The vitiligo white spots on the body can further add to this negativity as we compare to the unrealistic standards of beauty and good looks.
Instead, we recommend you to sharpen your personality traits and become the best version of yourself without chasing unrealistic goals.
It was not in your control that you developed vitiligo, but it’s definitely in your hands to make up for this ‘drawback’ by developing attractive personality characteristics such as positive attitude, confidence, dressing sense, good physique, financial responsibility and a sense of humor. As you shift your focus from vitiligo to other positive things in your life, which are in plenty, you would automatically develop an attractive personality.
Own your skin condition with confidence
Confidence is certainly the #1 quality of an attractive personality. If you wear your skin with pride, you are inspiring others to accept vitiligo as something normal. On the contrary, if you keep your skin condition as a topic off-limit, as something to hide, you are allowing others to make random guesses about it.
Whenever people give a stare to your vitiligo spots or enquire about them, grab that opportunity with a smile and educate them about the non-contagious and non-painful characteristic of these white spots. That’s it! You have neutralized that moment of negativity with an instant dose of acceptance and positivity.
Rejections are a part of the journey
As your dating journey continues, sometimes you will reject others and sometimes others will reject you. Rejections are a part of the process and with a skin condition on your sleeve, it might feel that they are happening more often than anticipated. Among all the people rejected by you, not everyone is rejected for physical appearance or looks. On the similar lines, vitiligo will not be the basis for most of the rejections you come across.
Even if someone rejects you for vitiligo, it’s alright. You are better off such shallow minded people.
Don’t remain in a relationship just for the sake of it
There is a difference between being comfortable and just settling.
Being comfortable implies that you don’t feel the pressure to look perfect; your partner embraces you with your skin condition as s/he got the wisdom to see beyond the skin ‘imperfection’ and admire you for who you are.
On the other hand, if you are just settling with someone who is kind of uncomfortable with vitiligo and keep on highlighting it and pushing you to do something about it, better you give a serious re-think if you are in a right relationship.
Such a partner may have own logic that s/he got nothing but clean and honest intentions and wants your good only. But, you would realize that deep down your partner is not accepting vitiligo. And, having tried so many things already, you know that vitiligo is not something easy to treat. So a constant pressure to get it treated or look good can be quite stressful to you.
So what’s the way out?
Reveal it to your partner that the constant reminder to get vitiligo treated is not helping the relationship; instead it’s making you conscious and anxious. If s/he still brings vitiligo into discussion frequently, you better move out of that relationship for your own good.
Final words
As we wrap it up, let us remind you that your happiness lies completely in your hands. You don’t need another person to make you happy. Having said that, it’s always a lovely feeling to have someone special in life who would make you feel desirable and attractive as you are.
So, don’t hurry to settle with someone, take your time to discover an interesting individual and then allow the things to take their natural course.
